Sunday, November 30, 2014

From Arguing To Reassurance

I'm in an argumentative mood, and so I'm trying to keep myself quiet and still. Most of these arguments are stirring within, although earlier today I was also arguing with the author of the book I am currently reading. I decided to put it down for awhile.
It could also be that I'm being judgmental and bitchy. 
Sunday evenings often cause my stomach to clench with anticipation and anxiety, and even more so because this coming weekend is my final weekend of yoga teacher's training. The final written test is Friday, and then my practicum class is Sunday afternoon, and even though I have been teaching for months, I'm still nervous. 
Writing is a quiet activity for me because it silences the screaming voice in my head. She is the one who is judgmental and bitchy, and unfortunately I'm along for the ride. 
I taught my yoga class this morning, and later, as I was going over it in my mind, I thought about how I find myself offering the very thing that I need the most. Toward the end of class, everyone was in a restorative heart opening pose, and although I'm not a huge fan of hands on adjustments, I went around to everyone in the room and applied gentle pressure to their shoulders for a few breaths. As I was walking away from one of my students, she whispered, "thank you," and I could feel the tears stinging my eyes. Sometimes all we need is reassurance that everything is going to be okay. 

Everything really is going to be okay...