An Eating Disordered Rant

I sit in my waste
disgusting sloth
beautifully dressed
in ballerina clothes
A quiet disguise
to fool the fans
I peel my scabs
loosening the skin
hoping to find
the new underneath
this body
sick and tired
of feeling
the rolls of flesh
that feed
Everyday wanting
more from me
Wanting nothing
but more, more, more
and where
is my control
to stop these feelings
of hunger, rage,
huge gaping holes
of need
that threaten
to take over
what has
always been
mine