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Thursday, September 4, 2008

The Glamorous Life



It is 2:00 a.m., and I know exactly why I'm up pacing the floor, and ultimately finding myself here, blogging. I'm worried and stressed over my impending colonoscopy. At this point, I'm not all that concerned about the results per se, but in the actual procedure itself. My nutritionist informed me of the fact that although you are somewhat sedated, they usually don't totally put you under, but because of my sexual trauma history, I will need to request that I not be awake at all. I don't want to be awake at all!!! For some reason though, I just dread having to tell whoever is scheduling my appointment, that I have a sexual trauma history. I will, but I just hate having to disclose that information over the phone, to a total stranger. Like I don't already do that here, on this blog! Funny, huh? My doctor's office called yesterday, and the results of my blood tests were all normal, but because of my stomach x-rays, they want to do the colonoscopy, and something else called a gastric emptying study. Despite what the media would have you believe, life with an eating disorder isn't all that glamorous!

7 Comments:

goooooood girl said...

i like......

Sassy Mama Bear said...

I am not sure you would have to mention the sexual trauma. I didn't when I requested full sedation for my colonoscopy. Just a thought, but you know you need to do what is best for you.
Glad the blood tests were normal, and pray the same for this.
Hugs

S. A. Hart said...

Regardless of your reasons, you should be able to ask the doctor for full sedation. I also applaud you forhaving the colonoscopy---it may just save your life. Wishing you all success.

HammelmanArt said...

Ask them to explain the not-fully sedation they might use. If it is the drug versed (sp?) you will be totally oblivious and non-caring. I had this for closed MRI when I was very claustophobic and it worked fine. good luck!

Megan Bayliss said...

My thoughts are with you Angela.

The Insane Writer said...

no eat disorder is glamorous. Please let us know how things go! HUGS

Lumina said...

I think your therapist is mistaken. My hub had one and remembers them saying "you are going to get a little sleepy" then, "Yeah, it's over." :) I don't think they can go through your ENTIRE colon with you awake at all. She might be thinking sigmoidoscopy. (I think that's the spelling/word) where they just look at the large and shorter intestine. Yours? The large and small...entire colon. If it were me? I would ask about that FIRST on the phone call...before disclosing. I really think you won't have to say a word. If you do? Think of this...so many more people than not, from my experience are or know someone who is a survivor...you won't shock them one bit. I had to tell my dentist once I found out online that I was not a "freak" but that most survivors have a really, really hard time in the dental chair...being trapped, the chair going back too far etc. It was a teeny bit embarrassing but right away, she understood AND thanked me for telling her an bringing the article in...she had no idea her patients may have all of those issues and fears.

You can do it! I have yet to do mine... :0