...To Have A Dream

Maybe one day

I will teach...

maybe one day

I will lead you toward the path 

of freedom...

I will...

once I find my way.

What I realized after my first yoga class was how I lost myself in the movement, not forgetting, but becoming one with my body. The inhale, the exhale, and then, beautiful surrender. This is not an easy feat for anyone, but for someone suffering from an eating disorder, and for someone who despised her body, it was a feat of great accomplishment. It faded soon after I stepped off of my mat, but I was hooked, and longed to learn how to carry this into my everyday existence. Not only did I want to carry it into my own life, but the idea of teaching this to other eating disorder and trauma survivors is something that I dream of making happen. I remember the first time a yoga teacher adjusted me in class. I just about jumped out of my skin! As a sexual abuse survivor, being touched without warning can be very frightening. The fight or flight mechanism takes over, and I was ready for a fight. It was a bit embarrassing, and I wished I had been more prepared. I think I would like to teach workshops on yoga to heal from both trauma and eating disorders, which often go hand in hand. I hope one day to move through my own struggles, to learn from amazing teachers, and to find a way to guide others in their healing journey. I've been thinking of ways that I could be of assistance in treatment and trauma centers, and this inspires me to one day get my teaching certificate. It feels so good to have a dream!