Deep inside, there is a part of me that believes that if I tried hard enough, I could somehow go back in time, changing the past forever. I'm certain that this magical thinking is what keeps me from reaching a state of acceptance, and yet, if only... Maybe this is why I struggled with the meaning of this quote that my therapist sent me. "Acceptance is giving up the hope of having a better past." I e-mailed my therapist about my frustration and confusion, and here was her kind reply.
"We Cannot Change Our Past....we can only accept it and realize that the good, the bad, and the un-notable all helped to form us.....in your case it helped to form a grown woman who has compassion for others, a desire to help, an ability to not judge and a strength that is sometimes enough to strike others in awe.....your voice is there ....it is just taking a break.....believe, believe, believe."
Thank you G.C.
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3 Comments:
Angela,
Such beautiful words. You have been blessed with a wonderful therapist. I have too, with a couple, during my heaing processes. If we reach out, finally, as you say, finding our Voice, there is always someone there, just waiting to pull us through.
Your blog is beautiful...
Thought of the Day:
"Because I remember, I despair. Because I remember, I have the duty to reject despair." - Elie Wiesel
Wow, what a powerful quote from your therapist and unfortunately, all too true.
Magical thinking seems to come with the territory when dealing with an abusive childhood.
I think to a certain extent you have found--and are using--your voice, otherwise you wouldn't be blogging about your quest for healing.
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