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Thursday, April 8, 2010

Never Enough

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There are lost pieces of me, a void unfilled, only an elusive dream that I continue to reach for. I want more than it is possible to have, grasping for what is missing in my life. Unsure of my own needs. I take greedily, an insatiable hunger. Always dissatisfied with what is right in front of me. Emptiness leads me down a lonely path, luring me into the darkness. Lost in the poison of my secret memories, kept hidden. I grieve for the child left behind to fend for herself. She is the hate that lives inside of me, the shame that I hold on to, the ugliness that I feel on the outside, when I look into the mirror of my own eyes.

4 Comments:

Wanda's Wings said...

To begin to care for the wounded child is the beginning of filling our needs.

Sunny said...

Oh my...this one really speaks to me.

Angie, you deserve sooooo much. I hope one day you'll realize this, take what you deserve and smile afterward. :)

<3 ya.

SFI said...

Take back the life from the one that left it. It is then when you look into the mirror of your own eyes that you will finally see you. ;o) I love the look of your site. There is such beauty inside of you lets shed some light on it. Take care my friend.

Flannery said...

I've had to catch up on your blog, too!

And what I see, over and over again, is how brave you are, and how strong you are, and how hard you are working to confront the demons and save yourself from them. And your demons are deeper and darky and more murky than most, which means, I think, that in the end, you're going to be stronger and braver and more resolute than most.

It's hard. It's so, so hard. I admire you so much.