Almost

It's St. Patrick's Day, spring is right around the corner, and it brings with it renewed hope. I had therapy yesterday, and I wonder if she has given up hope for me. She keeps saying that I will change when I'm ready, and leaves it at that...no more helpful words that only fall on deaf ears. She is waiting for me, but what if I'm never ready? That thought frightens me, but the fear of food and eating is what drives me to do the things I do. I do think about changing, and the steps that I might take. I want to be in touch with my body and treat it well instead of abusing myself. I need to get back to exercising, but I need to be able to eat enough to do that. Dave said he would pump up the tires on my bike for me. It is almost like flying to ride in the wind. I make plans, and I suppose that is the beginning of change. I feel like I'm almost there. Almost...