Monday, May 13, 2013

Battles To Be Won

Today I had a second steroid injection into my left hip, and right now it is still very painful. If I'm remembering correctly, besides being tender from the injection, I was feeling some relief, so I'm a little worried. I'm seeing another orthopedic surgeon next week for a second opinion and to see about what options are available other than a total hip replacement. I'm trying to be positive, but it is frustrating to be in so much pain just trying to perform everyday activities, let alone not being able to keep up with my yoga practice. The doctor I will be seeing specializes in hip arthroscopy and sports medicine, so hopefully after he looks at my MRI, he can help me to decide what the best option would be for my lifestyle.
It is hard on my eating disorder not being able to exercise, and although it is affecting how I feel about my body, I'm trying not to let it affect my food intake. I keep reminding myself that I don't need to punish my body anymore than I already have, and self care is important.  Three months ago, before the first injection, I was also in a lot of pain and had to take a few weeks away from exercising. I was angry, blaming myself, and my first reaction was to severely restrict what I was eating. Starving myself is only going to make matters worse, so this time I'm choosing to continue to nourish my body, even when the bitch in my head tells me that I'm fat and weak. The eating disorder doesn't get to win this battle. I do.