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Saturday, December 29, 2007

Masquerade

masked

Maybe sleeping through the night is a thing of the past. I wake up in a panic, as if I have something of great importance to do. It is an elusive feeling. I grasp blindly, but it slips away before I can figure it out. I feel this pressure now that I am home. All of these expectations about who I have become...I'm not there yet, and maybe these are just my own interpretations of who I think everyone else wants me to be. I'm used to wearing a mask to hide my feelings, and that is still difficult for me to let go of. There is this lump in my throat~tears unshed, and I know that soon they will pour out and take everyone by surprise. Not me. I'm expecting them.

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