I Am Self-Confident

Today is the first day of my winter break, and I was most certainly ready for it this year. Work has been stressful. I've realized that I really don't like change, and I have had to work at a lot of different schools in the past few weeks. It is like starting a new job all over again, and it is hard to feel comfortable at first. I guess I will have to get used to it though, as it is just part of the job. I have been spoiled the past few years because I have been with the same student, in the same school, and I am attached to both her, and the staff there, but she will most likely graduate this year, and also hasn't been attending regularly. I think that maybe she is finished with school, and is just ready to move on, although I think the socialization and time spent with her peers is still very important. Anyway...enough work talk! I'm on vacation! Woo hoo!!!

I'm going to go and get my hair cut today, and then do a little Christmas shopping. I'm hoping that the hair cut will help me feel cute:) I've been trying to work on giving myself positive messages. The one at the top of my list right now is, "I am self-confident." I think that more than anything, I would like to have that feeling of self-worth and self-confidence in my life.
I have also been working very hard on sticking to my meal plan the past two weeks. I had a bad slip over the Thanksgiving holiday, but now I'm back on track, and proud to say that I haven't restricted in two weeks. I think that this is a very significant improvement considering the letter that I had from my dad, which was upsetting. I didn't use restriction to cope with those feelings, so I feel great about that. I really haven't dealt with those feelings, and I haven't written him back yet, but I don't feel ready to do that at this point. When I told my therapist that same thing this week, she was so excited. She said, "That is a wonderful way for you to take care of yourself, and your needs." She is right. I am taking much better care of myself and all of my needs, and that includes feeding myself. I will get to writing that very painful letter to my dad when I feel that I am strong enough to emotionally handle it. In the mean time, "I am self-confident!"

P. S. Emery the rat is home with me for Christmas break, and even has a couple of presents under the tree from the students. She is greatly loved!