Summer Plans And Goals

As this school year winds down, it seems that the days get busier, and the kids that I work with are thrown a bit off kilter. Their routines get shaken up, and children with autism don't do well with change most of the time. The next two weeks are going to feel long. I wish that I was going to be off for the entire summer, but I went ahead and signed on to work summer school. My incentive is being able to afford a new laptop. It also gets me up and out of my p.j.'s, instead of lounging the day away. I will have a month of summer where I won't work, and that is still a good break.
I really want to focus this summer on moving my mind and body away from the eating disorder. Yoga has propelled me forward, and I'm improving in so many ways, but there is still so much work to do. The weather is warming up, the yoga clothes, and summer clothes in general are more revealing of my body, and that has made me self conscious and critical of myself. Today was a bad body image day, which I let affect my food intake, and the negative voices ran rampant through my mind. This week hasn't started off well when it comes to food, so I need to get my head back in the game. It is strange the amount of effort I have to put into eating. I know that is hard for people without eating disorders to understand. My hunger cues aren't reliable, and after so many years of restricting, it feels like eating the 3 meals and 2 snacks that I'm supposed to have is a lot of work, and a lot of food. I'm not even up to the snacks yet!
I still have great faith that I will get through all of this, and even the not so good days are steps on my journey.