Here and Now

I'm trying so hard not to cry. I just feel lonely right now, and I wish that I didn't have this ache in my heart. I don't seem to know what to do with myself. Dave is on his annual golf trip, so all I have are the boys, and they pretty much do their own thing. I guess teenagers are like that! Today was my last day of work for the school year, and I should be celebrating. I will miss my work friends, and even the kids, although a break from autism will be nice. I don't really have many plans for the summer. We may take a trip to Florida to visit my parents. Dave doesn't really want to do it. We will have to drive, and it is a long trip. If he doesn't want to go, then maybe I will take the boys on my own. There are also things that I want to do around my house, that I never seem to have the energy to do during the week. I'm feeling motivated at the moment. We will see how long that lasts:) I'm also feeling motivated to get the eating disorder under contro...

I'm feeling a bit lost without my husband nearby. He is off on his annual golf trip with his college buddies, and I really miss him. It is hard for me to get a good night's sleep. I know how important this trip is to him though. He is on full disability, so he is home all of the time, and I'm sure that getting away with his friends helps him to forget about everything for awhile. We are nearing the time for his MRI and neurology appointment. It is less than two weeks away, and I cannot wait! I'm so tired of the fear. I just want to know what we are dealing with, our treatment options, and what we need to do to be proactive. We are talking about going to The Mayo Clinic. I guess that all depends on what we hear at his appointment. Right now, I think that we both feel helpless because we don't have a plan of action. We know that the tumor is growing again, but because it is growing slowly, we haven't been told what we can do yet, and that is really frustrating. I ...