Here and Now

Today eating is not going so well, in fact, actually it is not going at all. Why does it feel so hard to walk into the kitchen and fix myself something to eat? If someone else made it for me, the likelihood that I would eat would probably increase. The act of actually nurturing myself is so very difficult. I want confirmation that I deserve to eat…that I am worthy. Crazy, huh? I plan on eating dinner, but that is the best that I can do today, considering that it is already 4:30. I'm trying not to beat myself up for it. I know that there will be days like this, but I wish that I could pinpoint why some days are easier than others. Oh well...here are some other random things to talk about besides eating disordered behaviors:) We are having an amazingly beautiful thunderstorm here at the moment. I lit some candles in the house, and turned on the twinkle lights that adorn the mantle on my fireplace. It is pretty. I like it:) Today #4 son brought home a piece of crap garage sale chair t...

There is nothing like waking up from a nightmare to start off the day. On top of that, once again, it is gloomy and cold outside. I was hoping for some sun during my spring break. The forecast for Thursday and Friday looks promising, but then they are saying maybe some snow over the weekend! Oh well... Here is what I've been up to~ Dave bought me a new iPod on Saturday, so today I have been busy loading my music onto it. For those who care, it is a pretty metallic purple one:) I went to the dentist and had the chip in my front tooth fixed. I had an accident on a mo-ped when I was in high school, and lost half of my front teeth. The bonding they fixed it with was starting to wear out, and I was scared the whole piece was going to fall off. I didn't want to look like a hillbilly! I'm knitting a scarf for a friends little girl. This will probably be the last of my knitting for awhile, since it is hopefully going to warm up soon. Laundry Cleaning. I'll be honest...I've ...